Being a father of a six-year-old has its advantages, though: I had a willing daughter excited to give the game a spin. Here's her "review"—as an interview, because as anyone who has conversed with six-year-olds knows, it's rather difficult to keep them on-topic.
Did you really like Animal Paradise?
Yeah.
What did you like best about it?
I liked when the Chihuahua chomped because it had a wide mouth, then closed, wide mouth, closed.
Why was he doing that?
Well, maybe the Chihuahuas really eat like that.
Oh, he was eating his food.
Yeah.
Did you get a lot of animal pictures? (Animal Paradise's claim to fame is its association with Hana Deka Club, those "big nose" animal photos. Making friends with animals will unlock photos for your perusing pleasure.)
Oh, yes. You can't wait to see Brownie's!
I got 18 pictures of him.
You got 18 pictures? Is that all the pictures you can get of him?
Of every animal.
So you can get 18 pictures of each of your animals?
Yeah.
Oh, I see. Did you play a lot with Brownie so you could get those pictures?
Oh yeah.
What did Brownie like best? Did Brownie like going for walks, or getting baths, or playing games?
Getting baths, I think, because every dog would just shake their head like this really fast. (shakes head vigorously)
Is there anything you didn't like about the game?
No, but, I'd better tell you about Ruby.
Who's Ruby?
She's one of the cats I named. I was bonding her on the face, and she went "meow! meow! meow! meow!" (Ruby is also the name of one of our real-life cats. I don't know if she's been "bonded on the face," or what the Humane Society would have to say about it.)
What does it mean when you say "bonding?"
It means to pet the animal.
Do you bond with your animals every day?
Yeah.
By making it possible with the old friends. If you make them a friend, then here comes a new animal!
Once you're good friends with one animal, then more animals will come?
Yeah.
So you have 18 animals, then? Can I see them?
(starts DS) You should see the funny ones.
252 pictures? Do you have all the pictures of all the animals?
Yeah! You have to look at Hunter G's picture (her hamster). He's on the island! Here, I'll show you who I like. This is "Silly," he's a chick. Here he is with all his friends.
That's really cute! So, do you think other girls would like this game?
Oh, yes. I'd better tell girls that I like it.
Oh, here are the mini-games. What are in the mini-games?
This is my favorite one, Shampoo Scrub. Oh, it's Karen! (She plays Shampoo Scrub, a minigame where she shampoos, scrubs, and rinses a dog. Karen is also my wife's name. Kids name animals the darnedest things.)
Daddy, the light's red!
Oh, well, you'd better bring it upstairs, I don't have any plugs down here. Thanks for showing me your game, and telling me about it!
Okay!